Merry Christmas & A Very Happy New Year 2012!!!
I have been writing like crazy and have a lot of new “stuff” prepared for you in 2012! Stay warm, be safe and many, many blogs to you in 2012!
Nadine
Continue reading Merry Christmas & A Very Happy New Year 2012!!!
No B.S.: Having The Birth You Want Takes Work! Part 2
In last week’s blog, we discovered why it takes concentrated effort to get the birth you want! So what do you do? Where do you start?
Time for some practical answers!
First, let’s reframe… ’cause no one wants or needs more work, right? In my one-on-one classes, I always use the word “PLAY” in stead of “work” as in homeplay (instead of homework) because of the heavy emotional charge of the word “work” (same as “labor” by the way).
Deep belly breathing is a calming and grounding!
So here is some homeplay for you: you can make it fun and light!
- Do your research! Read books (see our bookstore for my personal preferences and recommendations) or find lots of info online: read the articles on this site (back pain relief, hot bath guidelines, epidural side effect, self-hypnosis, etc.) or use the search box with key words and check out the links to other great website we like.
- Talk to your husband, decide what you want and commit to it! We are going to call that “The Birth You Want” or TBYW
- Organize your “support people” around TBYW. Choose a caregivers that supports your vision and will be there to hep you rather than impose a routine medical model on you. Interview and hire a doula that supports TBYW.
- Write a detailed birth plan: not too long but covering labor, birth and immediate after birth thinking about what is best for the baby’s best start.
- Choose a childbirth preparation program that empowers you, provides additional information and teaches you skills that are in agreement with TBYW. In doubt, go back to what made you decide on “that” birth in the first place.
- Find and commit to a regular (that means minimum once a week) “grounding” practice like yoga (prenatal or gentle), tai chi chuan, qigong, meditation or others… Breathing is an integral part of all these ancient practices and, yes, also an integral part in the process of grounding! (I am working on an article with video demos on pranayama- the ancient art of breathing life force).
- Set 10-15 minutes every day to connect with your baby in the womb. Use your imagination, gentle touch, talking, singing, even reading to your baby. Even more fun to do together with your husband or life partner.
Ten minutes a day of "baby connect": make it fun and playful!
- Self-hypnosis, guided imagery relaxation, Quantum Focusing® and visual daydreaming are all very beneficial in learning how to find your place of inner peace within and relax deeply any time you wish. I teach many “mindfulness” and centering fun and easy practices in my childbirth preparation program called “Quantum Birthing”. For a weekly (or even daily) practice, in bed at night or any time during the day download the free mp3 available on this website.
Try some of these, add your own ideas, let me know how it works for you…
Happy Pregnancy!
Continue reading No B.S.: Having The Birth You Want Takes Work! Part 2
No B.S.: Having The Birth You Want Takes Work! Part 1
Why do you have to WORK on having the birth you want?
It’s not a question, it’s actually an answer! I just wanted to get it out right upfront: if you want something different, unconventional and empowering for the birth of your child…, it is going to take preparation and dedicated time and effort from the moment you know you are pregnant!
Imagine, daydream, plan and relax!
When I say it is going to be “work” what I mean is that, there is a certain amount of ACTION required. It is not physically demanding (not more than the normal changes occurring in any pregnant body!), it is more of a conscious decision and willingness to “find out” -information-, research -more information- and practice -relaxation, self-hypnosis, yoga or other mind/body techniques- on a consistent basis.
Why, you asked?
1) Because the “full” information is not that easy to get. The so-called, believed experts are not in a full disclosure mode for what ever reason. And the information you do get may be very confusing, one person contradicting the other. It could be very upsetting in a way that it doesn’t make sense to you. So, you the consumer have to ask the questions, be curious and be willing to search and sort through the jungle of information to find what is right FOR YOU! And that is work!
2) If you are reading this post, you are likely very “unconventional”, going against the flow in most of your important life decision, right? Well if “the flow” is not satisfying to you, than going the opposite direction is the right way FOR YOU, isn’t it? Unfortunately, you know (or even have experienced), when you do things “differently”, when you take the road less traveled or get somehow above the crowd, they always want to bring you back down. So, you probably WILL encounter critics, negative comments and judgments. You are going to need support people (hopefully you life partner and family) and you are going to need some (maybe new) skills to stay grounded and confident in the midst of all that turmoil… And that is work!
3) Last of all: YOU! You are your worst enemy in this situation as in any situation! Your self-doubt and old fears (or new fears) and perhaps also the ones you picked up along the way from friends and family are going to “get to you”. What I called the “monkey” mind: the little voice inside your head that always brings you down, judges and criticizes when you have some beginning of a success… The monkey mind is going to scare you and will make you want to give up. There are techniques and practices that help you quiet it down and reconnect with that inner wise part of you, and empowers you… And that definitely is work!
Keep in your mind the wonderful picture of why you are doing all this and putting this much effort for these 9 monhs! Your beautiful baby deserves the best of your attention and dedication. Remember, the quality of life in the womb does make a difference in the adult life, research is proving it!
See you next week for Part 2: The Practical Answers!
Continue reading No B.S.: Having The Birth You Want Takes Work! Part 1
SEE ONLY LOVE: A Clue To Healing Emotional Trauma!
In the course of this Summer I underwent intense “training” and life readjustment! Some of you may know my husband got in a motorcycle accident! Relax! He is ok! He actually got out with very little physical harm but the event itself pushed him into “awakening”! See Sonia Choquette’s new book to help you if you are at that point in your life! There is a free “kindle” edition for a limited time!
"... drawn into a fast learning spiral!"
As his life partner, best friend and preferred helper/healer, I too was drawn into a fast learning spiral… I had been thinking, reading and “asking” for guidance in healing trauma (especially emotional trauma from birth) and there before me lied many of the answers. From the energetic approach and the “helper’s” way of “holding the space” for healing, to the unbelievable extend of the impact it (the trauma) has on one’s life and how it is all interconnected to the point where healing one aspect uncovers and potentially heals many others, older, forgotten ones.
I could go on in long and large for many pages (and you will see the impact of my discoveries in the future work that unfolds in the next year or two) BUT, for now here is in a nut shell: “See Only Love”.
Click on the image to read more about the "angel cards"
“See only Love” is the name of one of the cards from Doreen Virtue‘s “Daily Guidance from your Angels” deck. I picked that card today! It says “Look past the seeming errors, mistakes, and misunderstandings, and see only the love within each person (including yourself)…”
I realized how much I had done “that” in the past few weeks and how it is one key (if not the most important one) to healing emotional trauma! The truth is, no matter who the other person is (a spouse, a child, a friend, a client,….), they are already blaming themselves so much.
The blame and guilt keep the “trauma” energy trapped in stead of letting it just go through! Unconditional love and compassionate understanding allow that “healing space” for them to let it go! I remember clearly, in the ER with my husband in shock, his expression changing and my “feeling” was like a bubble had just burst!
So when your toddler does his next “booboo”, remember… “See only love”! When your next client “fails” to follow her birth plan… “Se only love”. When YOU make your next “oops”,… “See yourself only with love, as love, and loved”! Pick up the pieces and keep going with a lighter step…Perhaps!
We always are someone’s “healer”!
What’s your story?
Continue reading SEE ONLY LOVE: A Clue To Healing Emotional Trauma!
Breastfeeding Week August 1-7
Sometimes there is no need to reinvent the wheel! I have to admit Dr Darcia Narvaez does an excellent job in demonstrating the so much greater value of breastfeeding compare to formula feeding. She published with two of her students a series of 9 blogs (see below) full of scientific references in an attempt to awake a vastly uninformed or misinformed population!
Because of her strong “tone” in post # 8 (you know, the tone we use after logic, science and sweet talk have failed), she got a lot of “heat” from… Women!
Really?
No one wants to take away your right to raise your child as you please, it is just a matter of making sure you have ALL the RIGHT information… Not reduced to the biased info fed back to you by the media and the medical community influenced by pharmaceutical and food companies only interested in making more money! It is your child health (maybe even your child’s life) at stake after all! So wouldn’t you be grateful that someone as qualified as Dr Narvaez steps up on a soap box once in a while and ruffles some of your comfortable beliefs?
If you are ready to learn more go read Dr D. Narvaez’ breastfeeding series.
If you are not a “reading” kind of person, here is a video her students made just for you!
Infant Nutrition: Breastfeeding vs. Formula, Darcia Narvaez
Here is where Dr Narvaez sets the record straight Breastmilk Wipes Out Formula: Responses to Critical Comments, and I particularly like the very last paragraph where she gives a few ideas on what YOU (anyone) can do to help change the general population awareness!!!
BREASTFEEDING is EVERYONE’S BUSINESS!
If you have stories or comments that enlighten how much we need to change as a society in regards to breastfeeding, please share with us!
Emy’s First Baby: Hypnosis- and Water-birth!
Emy was a single mom at the time she contacted me. She surprised me with an unusual common sense and such strong determination to “do the right thing” for her baby’s sake! She had a lot to be scared about but she was extremely wise and smart in choosing her “helpers” in this fantastic journey! She chose Dinah Waranch, a nurse-midwife owner of The Lover’s Lane Birth Center and opted for a waterbirth! She also learned self-hypnosis and the “Quantum Birth” program with me. Her baby boy was born Thursday at 5:21 AM in the water after only a few hours of active (strong) labor.
Here is her story in an email she sent me a few months after:
“It was such an amazing birth!”
“I started feeling the first signs of labor at about 11:30 Tuesday night, very mild contraction.[That is what is called early labor, no need to change anything in your routine]….[Sonogram appointment on Wednesday, doctors want to induce, midwife said get a good night sleep, we'll do it tomorrow... ] At 11:30PM on Wednesday night, my water broke and it was obvious no induction would be needed.
The hypnosis worked wonders during the first 24 hours of labor. In fact, sometimes I wasn’t completely sure if I was really having any contractions because as soon as I felt something I would relax and all of a sudden it seemed to disappear. During the stronger labor, it took a lot more effort and concentration but I still think it went absolutely amazing.
It was more tiring than anything I have ever done which is pretty much a given with something that works you out like labor. I was already about 5 centimeters dilated when I got to the birth center which was an hour or two after the strong labor started up. It went so quick from there. I was only in the strong labor for about 5-6 hours.
Sometime during that time, I have no idea what time exactly because I was so zoned out, I decided to get into the water and it helped a lot. I remember thinking how I was afraid Dinah (my midwife) would think it was slowing my labor down because it was so relaxing. I could feel the contractions but they weren’t near as intense. I got out of the water at one point so I could lye on my side in the bed and then all of a sudden I just felt the need to push and started doing it.
At that point Dinah called her assistant and I went back into the water, it just felt right to birth him there. It was amazing feeling him come down the birth canal. I could actually feel him move back a bit when I closed my legs after a contraction so I had them hold my legs apart in between contractions (I was laying on my side because that kept me underwater best). Then I pushed him out with this energy that I have no idea where I got it from and I remember feeling this movement and I assumed it was Dinah doing something and I asked her not to do it because it hurt and she told me that it was the baby moving his head, how cute! And with the next contraction he was out.
I asked my mom about how long I was pushing and she said it was about 10 minutes. I remember feeling him being put on my chest and it took me a few seconds to open my eyes because I was just so focused on the feeling of him being pulled up and set onto me.
After a few days, I started thinking how I can’t wait to have another one…. I think a big part of what made it so amazing was the fact that I did it myself. I had assistance when I needed it, but I still did it myself, no one did it for me. I honestly don’t think I could’ve had a better first birth experience.
The one thing I would change about that day is maybe with the next one I’ll get more sleep once the baby goes to sleep. I was too excited and kept staring at him and didn’t take advantage of the opportunity for sleep. 
Well, I’m really tired and must get some sleep. Can’t wait to see you!”
Emy
Dallas, February 10, 2006
For the record, Emy’s baby was 8lbs10oz and she had just a little tear that did not need stitches. I have seen it over and over again: small women can birth big babies, if they are in the right (relaxed) environment, and allowed to follow their body’s lead in terms of position, “pushing” and everything else at the time of birth!
Also, it is more difficult to stay in the pain-free “zone” all the way without a partner or a doula trained in hypnosis… (More on the important role of the partner in another blog)
Comments? Questions? Do you have a similar story you want to share?
Continue reading Emy’s First Baby: Hypnosis- and Water-birth!
When Hypnosis is a Great Adjunct to Hospital Birth!
I am so grateful to Shari for allowing me to share her story with you! She is living proof that learning self-hypnosis and getting informed and prepared for childbirth is always worth the time and money even when “things” don’t go exactly as planned!
Shari with her newborn baby Asher
Listen to what she has to say just a few days after the birth!
Click HERE to listen to the Audio interview
Shari gave birth to her second child after just a few hours of labor!
Continue reading When Hypnosis is a Great Adjunct to Hospital Birth!
Five Tips to Create a Sacred Space
Butterflies, and pretty art for your space
No matter what your religious beliefs are or your philosophical inclination in life, it is quite well accepted now-a-days that taking some time for yourself every day has great health benefits and improves your contentment in general. It can even improve your clarity of mind and speed up your decision making.
When a woman is pregnant, it is of great benefit for both mom and baby to dedicate some of that time to create a special bond, a psychic connection or telepathic conversation with your baby in the womb… What ever appeals to you most. You may call it praying, meditating, day dreaming or quiet sitting; your choice! The name is unimportant! What matters is DOING it!
To make it easier for you and your family, it helps to practice always at the same place and about the same time of the day. The people around you will learn not to bother you or call you at those times. Also, objects do carry an energy; so surrounding yourself with meaningful objects of beauty will support you in your practice. You will look forward to that time to sit in your “Sacred Space”, and you will feel the familiar support of the objects there, time after time.
So here are five tips to help you start a practice or make yours even easier to keep!
- Make your sitting experience a comfortable one. There is nothing wrong in sitting on a straight back chair with your hands on your lap. If you can sit crossed legs, it helps open the pelvis (good practice for birth), but make sure your knees are on the floor and your buttocks a little higher than your knees. You could slide a rolled blanket under, for example.
- Create a space that can remain yours at all times. For example, set a small table or a short shelf. Pick a beautiful cloth with pretty colors to cover your table and set on it items of significance to you: a flower, a crystal or a pretty stone from somewhere you visited and had fun, a fragrance like essential oil or incense, a small water fountain, a statue, … There are many symbols for many different culture that may be of importance to you. Just think of objects that make you smile inside as out!
- Pick a special candle you like for its color(s) and for its scent. Place it in a safe container big enough to protect the cloth and everything around it. Light it when you are ready to start, it will energize and enlighten your whole space. Never leave a burning candle unattended!
- You can play soft music if you like. At the beginning, it may help to play the same piece for 21 days so that the music will carry your mind automatically to your place of peace… Speeding up the “connection” process if you would!
- To quiet your mind and shift from the outside world to the inside world, a simple yet very efficient way is to take a few deliberate breaths through your nose and exhale very, very slowly through your nose also. For example, you could inhale to the count of 3 and exhale to the count of 6 (or 4-8), or whatever works for you as long as the exhale is longer than the inhale. Practice until you notice a quietness of the regular flow of thoughts and a sense of peace within you.
Crystals that appeal to you...
Aromatic candle, flower, pretty colors and sensual aromas, enhance the energy in your sacred space and help you discover that place of peace within where you can meet your baby. Now, you may start your private encounter with your Self, and your baby’s Spirit!
Side Effect of Epidural Anesthesia: Rare but Real!
In my 12plus years of doula career, I have seen many clients get an epidural, usually as a last resort. Being exhausted and with no relief in sight… It was a life saver for them. It happens to many (too many) women in labor (Why? is a different story and I will need another blog for just that topic…).
As a hypnotist, I know the power of the mind and I also believe that “Thoughts create Reality”. So, I hesitated to even post all the possible side effects, some permanent in very rare cases. But the truth needs to be accessible so that you are making INFORMED decision when it comes to your body, your health and your baby’s health!
So here is just a simple list (adapted from see source below):
1 ) Significant Low Blood Pressure
2 ) Fetal Distress
3 ) Cannulation
4 ) Trauma to Blood Vessel
5 ) Puncture Dura
6 ) Infection
7 ) Bach ache
8 ) Broken Catheters
9 ) Abnormal Uterine Contractions
10) Increased use of forceps and vacuum extraction in second stage
11) Inadequate pain relief ( For 7.1 % of women, it doesn’t work!)
12) Accidental Spinal Anesthesia
13) Maternal Heart Attack
14) If you have asthma, it can get worse during labor
15) Medication interaction i.e. with the prostaglandin gel used in some cases to induce labor
16) If you had migraine, that can get worse
17) Interactions with other illnesses
18) Fever and Malignant Hyperthermia
19) Respiratory Arrests (you stop breathing because your diaphragm is numb)
20) Neurological Disabilities
21) Nausea (30% of women)
22) Vomiting (3-7% of women)
23) Allergic conditions may worsen
24) Heart problems
25) Headache
26) Temporary paralysis
27) Recurrence of Herpes Simplex (if you had it in the past, it could flare up again!)
28) Permanent Disability
29) Death
It is a balancing act to get information and than decide what is best for you and your baby. Get you partner involved, so he too knows the “inside story” and can advocate for you when you are staying focused during labor and connected with your inner work and your baby. Once your decision is made, make total peace with it, because that is what is most important after all!
Let me know… Was it useful to you? Did it help you decide? Or Would you rather not have known?
P.S.: In my “Quantum Birthing” hypno-program for childbirth, I teach a simple technique called clearing the “Library of Record” to help erase or cancel the negative beliefs and information not in alignment with your blissful, undisturbed, normal birth!
Source: Medical Risks of Epidural Anesthesia during Childbirth by Lewis Mehl-Madrona, MD, PhD and Morgaine Mehl-Madrona, midwife.
You might also like: Is Epidural a Safe Way to Have Pain Free Childbirth?
Continue reading Side Effect of Epidural Anesthesia: Rare but Real!
Is Epidural a Safe Way to Have Pain Free Childbirth?
I have read on other “mom and baby” blogs comments like: ” For pain free birth get an epidural!”. My epidural was the best thing ever, I was rested and did not feel a thing.” That is until the effect wears off, mind you! I know, epidural anesthesia can be a life saver but do you really know the risk you and your baby are taking?
Epidural Anesthesia: so common we seem to forget its risks!
They say: “Women are almost never given informed consent for epidurals. Even if they were, just read two paragraphs from the package insert that comes with the medication used for epidurals (manufactured by Abbott Laboratories), they might think twice.”
The package insert states:
Local anesthetics rapidly cross the placenta, and when used for epidural, caudal or pudendal anesthesia, can cause varying degrees of maternal, fetal and neonatal toxicity….
Adverse reactions in the parturient, fetus and neonate involve alternations of the central nervous system, peripheral vascular tone and cardiac function….
Neurologic effects following epidural or caudal anesthesia may include spinal block of varying magnitude (including high or total spinal block); hypotension secondary to spinal block; urinary retention; fecal and urinary incontinence; loss of perineal sensation and sexual function; persistent anesthesia, paresthesia, weakness, paralysis of the lower extremities and loss of sphincter control all of which may have slow, incomplete or no recovery; headache; backache; septic meningitis; meningismus; slowing of labor; increased incidence of forceps delivery; cranial nerve palsies due to traction on nerves from loss of cerebrospinal fluid.
Would you sign a consent for an epidural if it included the above language? The Mehl-Madrona also state: “The degree to which the facts about the risks of epidural anesthesia are hidden from women in labor is astonishing”. And I agree. What happened to “informed consent”!
Would you do it now that you have read the “insert”? Would you do it again? What do you think?
Let’s share…
source: Medical Risk of Epidural Anesthesia during Childbirth
Continue reading Is Epidural a Safe Way to Have Pain Free Childbirth?
